He is a lying, cheating, selfish male who turns the his worst qualities back at me and makes me suffer when he screws up. He leaves me with the responsibility of explaining his mess to those he hurt and uses everything I have for his own immediate gradification. He never makes love, just bangs the crap out of me and uses my deepest secrets agienst me because he likes to see me in pain. He steals from people and can't even have a bank account because there are warrants out for his arrest. Yet every night he tells me he loves me and that I am everything to him, then he leaves in the middle of the night for days. Drugs made him this way. Drugs and lies. He used to be a good person but he's an addict now and I can't be around him anymore.

I have no friends.

Is he in love with her? The girl he left me for. Threw away everything, all 5 years, like I was nothing. Or is he using her? I drove to the other side of the country to start a new life away from him. He started to write to me. Saying he was sorry. He loved me. But never answered my questions. How is it love when there is no respect?

i hate my life

We got close today.

I wonder if it would be ok if you came over some time and lie next to me in my bed. You could hold my waist and we could talk or sleep or whatever for a while. You would leave your scent on me, you always have such a lovely smell.

I think I am falling for you a bit more then I ought to. You are kind of incredible.

You see the thing about trying to rid yourself from delusions is that you attempt to see yourself as you are. I know I am not your type, I am not attractive enough or stable enough or nice enough. Sometimes it causes me much angst, other times none at all. I do want you, but I want all of you a quick fix would not be enough. I want the real thing with you.

I'm 17 and I want a baby. More than anything in my life, I want my own child.

My own friend spread a rumor about me being a drug addict. My mom found out, and it does not help a depressed woman to think her only son is a drug addict. I feel pissed off and let down. Why does this shit have to happen to me?

i can't stand my oldest nephew.

I hate you Brooke.
i know what you did. You shouldnt have tried to make him jealous.
He doesnt give a shit.
and we just laugh at you, slut!
i know im not perfect.
But i just love the way he thinks you're stupid.
Carry on the way your going.
you're just pushing him away.
and hopefully slowly and/or painfully killing yourself in the process.

i feel much better now.

when i go to the doctors i always wish i have a diesase which is killing me, because im a coward and wont kill myself just in case their is a heaven and hell.

im in love with my 'friend with benefits' we never told anyone about the things we did then i didnt take time to wonder why we kept it a secret...i figured its because he was respecting me and didnt want me to be called a whore then i found it was because he was in love with another girl and didnt want to ruin what she thought of him
im an idiot
for some reason i thought pleasing him would be make him like me back.
haha now i know im just a dirty slut.
i want to die

I am not happy in my current relationship even though he is perfect to me. It is because I still have so much anger for my ex. That passion means I am not over him. I can't move on!

If I stay with him he is going to hurt me.

I had an affair with sisters husband. We were together even before they had plans to marry. He was ten years older than me and useto come into my bedroom of a night time when everyone else was asleep. I fell in love with him. The few people i have told told me that he took advantage of me but i loved him.
Even after they married and then seperated i still saw him. I love him so much.

I still have only ever told two people and can't bare to tell my closest friend as she thinks cheating and underage relationships are wrong..

Everyone thinks that i am so confident. So confident with my appearance, attitude and love life..

If anyone ever critisises me or talks back to me though it eats me up and kills inside